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The "Busy Mum" and Man Flu: A Revelation

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Firstly, if I ever see another "as a busy mum" ad, dosing herself up with painkillers to continue with her day of food prep, day-care drop off, corporate slaying and smiley, even-tempered child-cuddling in the evening, I think I might pierce my fingers through the screen to scratch her perfectly complexioned, dark-circle-free skin. Secondly, if I again see my (male) partner or someone else's on the couch, silent and unmoving under a blanket with “man flu” while their children require attention s…

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So Anna, what do you actually do?

This question has been cropping up a bit lately, so I thought I'd give you the low down.

 

Postpartum traditions across over 170 cultures share five key components. Provision of the first four of these (extended rest, warmth, nourishing food, and body work) are reliant upon a bedrock of community support. In times past, the support of our village of sisters, mothers, aunts and grandmothers functioned as a source of immunity for new mothers from exhaustion, overwhelm and long-term physical an…

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Matrescence: The One Word You Need To Know To Feel Less Crazy

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Through adolescence the child becomes an adult. They grow in physical stature, hormones rewire their brain, they form new relationships and adjust old ones, their identity is forever transformed as they set new goals and take on new roles and responsibilities. In much the same way, through matrescence the pre-child maiden becomes the mother. She grows in emotional scope, hormones rewire her brain to think of safety in terms of "are we safe?" rather than "am I safe?, her identity is transformed, …

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How to Set Boundaries On Visitors (Without Sounding Ungrateful)

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When you have a baby, visitors can be a blessing or a curse. Here are some ideas on how to set boundaries around visitors during the time when your needs are just as high as your baby's. This is an area where your partner or support person is vital in enforcing your agreed rules - healing post-birth, feeding a baby and maintaining any kind of adult conversation is hard enough without having to get up the courage to tell your mother-in-law it's getting late and time to leave.

  1. Set up a time for…

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Your Mothering is Political, and That's Not a Bad Thing: My Attempts at Anti-Racism Through Mothering.

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**[2021 edit - A year later, I see how much more I still have to learn. How many more layers of indoctrination and ancestral actions are alive in me. I pledge to engage in re-education, that is the unlearning and relearning, that is needed to become an ally and accomplice in every sense.]

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I sit here between the shadow of the Watagan mountains and Awaba, which is what Lake Macquarie was called before colonisation, dispossession and genocide. I would like to begin this article by acknowledging…

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Notes From A "Recovering Perfectionist": Why I Will Never Be The "Perfect Mother" And Neither Will You.

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One of my Mama Mentors recently described herself as a “recovering perfectionist”. Having been a perfectionist in my past academic and professional life, I have tried to sidestep this trait in my mothering. Sometimes it creeps in though, and I think of ways that I could become the “perfect mother”, and truly give my child the absolute best of everything.

Ideas whirl in my head – how to improve myself to live up to (what I think are) my own expectations. So I decided to get to know her, the “per…

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Stand Up To "Mum Posture"

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Standing. How can something as basic as standing be different pre and post-pregnancy, even in "uncomplicated" pregnancies and deliveries? And how do we not even notice "mum posture" dragging at our bodies?

As pregnancy progresses, uterus and baby get bigger and heavier, and our organs get pushed up higher in our abdomen to make room for them. Our pelvis tips forward to give more space for baby, and we stick our chest out (called rib flaring) so as to not overbalance and give ourselves some spac…

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Three things new mums can learn from cats

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As a self-proclaimed “dog person” it pains me to say this, but there is a lot new mums can learn from cats. These are my top three mama cat wisdoms.


  1. Hide away to prep for birth. I don’t recommend actually hiding like those cats that end up with litters of kittens stuck in drains or ceilings, but in a way birthing cats have it right. They take themselves to a secluded, dimly lit place where they feel secure from predators. In doing so they can turn their focus internally and birth without fe…

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10 Tips To Help Dads Pick The Perfect Present For Their Partner

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Mothers' Day in Australia has been and gone for another year. Breakfast in bed is off the cards until at least her birthday. Having exhausted gift ideas on her "Hallmark Holiday" let me give you my top ten tips to choose the perfect gift for the miraculous mum and partner in your life!

Let's start by making it clear (and cheaper!): we don’t want stuff. We especially don’t want one of those light boxes to dry your painted nails in, and we definitely don’t want a new vacuum cleaner or kitchen app…

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How to build your mama village (without compromising your values)

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Long had I watched mum groups in cafes and felt a pang of jealousy as I took my keep-cup back to my baby capsule-free car. Yes I was envious of the baby, but I was also envious of their almost tribal connectedness. I yearned for the deep knowing looks those mothers gave each other across conversation that hardly happened as they each nursed and wrangled their children in a public place.

My baby eventually arrived, but my mama wolf pack didn’t suddenly materialise. Where did I go wrong? Over a…

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